Untouched and raw stories: unedited, uncensored, unformatted, and sometimes unbelievable!

Unfiltered Story #56613

Unfiltered | October 15, 2015

(I work for a department store that has its own credit card. All associates are supposed to open one a shift, and I’m quite bad at it as I don’t like to push people who say “no.” But we’re supposed to ask everyone, and how many cards we open is part of our performance review. I usually ask at the end of the transaction, so that I can give them a rough idea of what they’ll save. I’m ringing out a customer one day when my coworker, who is new, starts talking to my customer.)

Coworker: Do you have a card with us?

Customer: No.

Coworker: Would you like to open one? It only takes a second and you could save up to 20%.

Customer: Sure.

(My coworker gets onto the other register while I’m still ringing his items up and starts the process before looking over at me.)

Coworker: You don’t mind, right?

Me: Well I’d prefer if I could log in for it.

Coworker: Well, I asked him, so…

(I just blink and shrug, finishing up while she runs the credit application through. I didn’t bother pointing out that she had no reason to ask him, as she was not the person assisting him, and I would have asked him if she had not butted in on my transaction. Why she was loitering behind the counter when the whole department needed to be straightened up is beyond me…but maybe this explains why she does so well at signing people up.)

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Unfiltered Story #32158

Unfiltered | October 14, 2015

(Our group is cleaning out a closet after school. One person has to leave, so our advisor wants to take a picture before she goes. A few people are outside throwing away garbage.)

Teacher: Come on, we all need to get together. Where’s [Student 1]? (Teacher goes outside and yells at [Student 1].) [Student 1]! Come in here, little buddy!

(Everyone stands together for a picture. Our advisor is rearranging us.)

Teacher: Hey, what’s your name? Yeah, you.

Student 2: …[name]

Teacher: [Name]? You’re cute. Come in front here.

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Unfiltered Story #66973

Unfiltered | October 14, 2015

(I work in the Ladies wear department of a large store that has changing rooms for specific genders. Although we make occasions for small children under the age of ten.

There is a sign outside and on each door of the fitting rooms that it is one person per cubicle. I’m on the fitting rooms with a coworker who had just let them into the rooms, and I show them to an empty one.They had childrens clothes for the boy,)

Me: Feel free to sit just outside the room, mam.

Mother: What!? Hes only seven! I cant leave him alone!

Me: I’m sorry ma-.

Mother: Well you know what, All the other shops allowed me in with him. I’m not shopping here anymore and I want to talk to your manager NOW.

Me: Mam, there’s no reason to cause a situation, There’s a double room available at the mo-.

Mother: NO! I am so angry right now!

– She storms out to the front where my coworker is and badgers her until we call a manager over. The little boy was standing with me with a red face.-

Mother: -Name- get over here now! We’re leaving right now!

– The little boy then moves to his mother, he was starting to cry, when my manager comes along and pulls her to the side, a few minuets later me and my coworker hear her screaming and shouting, and watch her being removed from the store by security guard, gingerly followed by the little boy.-

(My manager comes back a little while later with a rather red cheek, she gives me and my coworker the rest of the day off, apparently she was well known for bringing the child in and stealing the most expensive children’s clothes we have in store, but never were able to catch her in the act. )

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Unfiltered Story #27886

Unfiltered | October 14, 2015

(Two friends and I are relaxing in the student lounge. I’ve been very busy of late, so haven’t gotten much sleep. When I can barely keep my eyes open any longer…)

Me: “Guys, I’m really sorry, but I’m going to turn in early tonight.”

Friends #1: “Aw, c’mon, man, its way to early to sleep!”

Me: *Stands up* “Nope, not this time. I’ve got a really full day tomorrow.”

Friend #1: *Shouting melodramatically* “But (my name), you cannot go! Please, do not leave me!”

Me: *Followin suit* “I shall miss you dearly, but I must depart. We will meet again soon, though – I swear it to you!” *Opens door*

Friend #1: “Farewell, then, (my name)! I love you!”

Friend #2: *Bursts out laughing hysterically* “Dude…”

Me: “So long!” *Pokes head back around the door, grinning* “Oh, and thanks for all the fish!”

(And this is why we are the main act of entertainment in the student lounge!)

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Unfiltered Story #47584

Unfiltered | October 14, 2015

(My parents are both pretty conservative with their humor around my brother and me. My dad can’t stand the band The Carpenters, but my mom loves them. It’s almost Christmas and the Carpenters are on the radio with “Merry Christmas Darling.”)

Mom, to me: “I love this song, but your father always ruins it for–”

Dad: (singing along, extremely out of key) “‘Logs on the fiiiiiire, fill me with desiiiiiire!’ That means she’s horny…”

Mom and me: *dying laughing*

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