Untouched and raw stories: unedited, uncensored, unformatted, and sometimes unbelievable!

Unfiltered Story #27877

Unfiltered | October 5, 2015

(I was sitting at my table enjoying a drink before my meal at this restaurant and there was a family with a baby no more than a year old.)

Me: Hi, little guy! *smiles and waves*

Baby: *barfs all over himself*

(My mom laughed so hard at that and it was pretty funny looking back at it now.

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Unfiltered Story #47575

Unfiltered | October 5, 2015

My sister, my two brothers and I were sitting at the table eating dinner while our parents were outside arguing, when my little brother speaks up.

Sam: I wish there was no such thing as angriness.

My sister and I: Naaawww

Other little brother: I wish there was no such thing as Sam.

My sister and I: *facepalm*

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Unfiltered Story #56603

Unfiltered | October 5, 2015

[I locked my keys in my car and as a result, leave probably half an out late to get to work. Even though I’m guessing I’ll be to work within 10 minutes of my usual time, and my coworker notoriously hangs around talking at me for 15-20 minutes after her shift ends, I call as a courtesy to let her know.]

COWORKER: Hi. [Library.]

ME: Hi, it’s me, I just wanted to let you know, I locked my keys in my car and am only just now leaving. I’ll be there by a quarter after, tops, probably sooner.

COWORKER *long pause*: Should I wait?

[Keep in mind, at this hour, she would be the *only* employee in the library except for maybe one student volunteer.]

ME: Um . . . I would? Yes?

COWORKER: ‘kay.

[When I arrived, barely ten minutes after, I saw her walking to her car as I was pulling up. Guess if I wasn’t there to talk at, no reason to stay late!]

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Unfiltered Story #32148

Unfiltered | October 4, 2015

(I have playground duty twice a week and a student I don’t know approaches me, crying.)

Student 1: They’re being mean to me! *points to some boys playing nearby*

Students 2, 3, 4 and 5: *look exasperated*

Me: How were they being mean to you?

Student 1: They keep running away from me!

Me: (to other students) Why do you keep running away from him?

Student 2: We were playing tag, and he was it. But we’re not playing anymore.

Me: (to student 1): Were you playing tag with them?

Student 1: Yes, but I didn’t want to be it! *is still sobbing*

Me: Well, that’s how the game is played. Did you know that was how the game was played?

Student 1: Yes. But I didn’t want to be it! *is still crying*

Me: That’s just the way it works. But it doesn’t matter, because everyone is playing a different game now.

Student 1: But I want to play tag! I just don’t want to be it.

(This continues for a few more rounds, the boy still crying the whole time. Eventually I give up and walk away. The boy immediately stops crying)

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Unfiltered Story #66963

Unfiltered | October 4, 2015

I work in a relatively small amusement park just outside of Philadelphia. People come from all over to see the characters that the park is known for. While the prices are quite high, park employees have no responsibility for them and can’t change them at all.

Me: Hi! Welcome to [Park Name]! How can I help you?

Guest: You can tell me why the prices here are so f***ing high!

Me: Well, I have no control over the prices-

Guest: What do you mean, you have no control? Don’t you work here?

Me: Well, yes, I do work here, but I only sell the tickets, I don’t control the corporation that decides the price.

Guest: That is ridiculous! I demand you give me the lowest possible price!

Me: Do you have a coupon or a season pass? Or do you know someone with a season pass? Or are you the family member of an active military soldier?

Guest: ….No, but what does that have to do with anything?

Me: Those are the only ways to get a discount.

Guest: …I want the season pass then. At least then I only have to pay once.

She then proceeds to purchase four of the most expensive of the three types of season passes that the park offers. So instead of storming off in a huff like I expected, she spent more money after ranting about the high prices.

Guest: Thank you!

Me: [I wave absently] [to my coworker, I say]: did that just happen?

Coworker: I’m just as surprised as you are.

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