Unfiltered Story #141239

, , , | Unfiltered | February 19, 2019

(I work in a call center where I take inbound calls to enroll people in our service, as well as provide support to current and previous customers.)

Caller: I recently enrolled with you, but my service hasn’t gone active, so I want to check the status of my account.

Me: (after gathering the customer’s info and pulling up their account) Okay, it seems your enrollment was rejected because we were informed you don’t live at the address you want to receive our service at. I’d be happy to confirm everything and resubmit your information to get your service started.

Caller: Oh…I did move around that time, so I guess I gave you my old info.

Me: No problem! I can definitely get everything updated and corrected so I can resubmit it and get service started.

(At this point, I attempt to start verifying information and correcting the incorrect information that was previously provided, but the caller is being difficult throughout it).

Caller: I don’t understand why my service didn’t go active. I got a confirmation number after I enrolled!

Me: Ma’am, that confirmation number is simply the number attached to the recording of your phone call, in which our computer verbally recites each piece of information you provided about yourself and asks you to verify that we correctly entered the information you provided us, as well as confirming that you are verbally agreeing to be our customer, and that you agree to our terms of service. We had no way of knowing you didn’t actually live at the address you provided us until we actually attempted to establish the service there.

Caller: But I got a confirmation number! I don’t understand.

Me: Again ma’am, that number simply confirms that you have verified that we correctly entered in the information as you provided it to us.

Caller: Someone should have called me!

Me: Ma’am, I apologize that didn’t happen, but I’d be happy to get everything corrected now.

Caller: So you’re saying this is all my fault?!

Me: (no..I’m only thinking it) Ma’am I apologize that your enrollment was rejected, but I’d be happy to correct everything.

Caller: But this isn’t fair! Why are you blaming this all on me? I want my service with you backdated!

(Basically, because the company that she’s currently receiving service from currently is more expensive, she wants our pricing to be retroactive…so she can have our pricing instead for those months…when she wasn’t actually receiving our service during that time and was still someone else’s customer. confused yet?)

Me: …Ma’am, I’m sorry but that’s just not possible.

Caller: Why not?! I enrolled on XX/XX/XXXX date, so I want the agreed price for that time! The other company is too expensive and that’s why I wanted your service instead of theirs!

Me: Ma’am, I’m sorry but I can’t undo the past. They already provided the service.

Caller: I can’t believe you won’t do anything about this! You should’ve called me! Why are you blaming this all on me?

Me: Ma’am, I apologize again and I’d be happy to correct your info so we can begin providing service to you and getting you our lower price.

Caller: I’m done! You certainly did not provide 5 star customer service today and I can’t believe you won’t do anything to help. Goodbye! (customer hangs up)

Me to the sound of a disconnected call: *sigh* You have a great day, ma’am.

Unfiltered Story #141235

, , | Unfiltered | February 19, 2019

I work in a small environmental lab in the Midwest USA. Fish fry season is big here, with newspapers publishing a map to local events every weekend. Part of the popularity is due to the practice of abstaining from any meat but fish on Fridays during the period of Lent, which covers about six weeks from Ash Wednesday to Easter Sunday. Lent is observed by many Christian religions, particularly Catholics in our area. The vast majority of my coworkers are self-professed Catholics who observe Lenten dietary restrictions. Many others do so out of respect for their coworkers. Others just like fish. I belong to the latter two groups. Please note, we are a close-knit, family-type company. The result of all this is, on any given Friday, someone, usually the boss, has brought enough fish and side-dishes for everyone.
Our break room is only one door down from the main offices. It’s Friday afternoon, and the lovely aroma of fried fish permeates the building.  A customer stopped by to drop off coal samples for testing, and remarked on the smell of fish.
Boss: There’s plenty in the break room. Go fix you a plate!
Customer: *wrinkling his nose* Why does it smell like fish?!
Boss: Well, it is Friday. <District Manager> brought Long John Silvers for everyone.
Customer: That’s disgusting! This is a business! It shouldn’t smell like f****** fish!
Boss: Many of our employees observe Lent, so the only meat they can eat on Friday is fish.
Customer: I don’t f****** care! It’s making me sick!
Boss: Well, I’m sorry about that.
Customer: <storming off, echoes down the hallway> It smells like f****** fish!
There was a few moments of silence, then everyone within earshot started laughing. Best part – the customer heard it and shut up!

Unfiltered Story #141231

, | Unfiltered | February 19, 2019

I worked at a call center supporting various appliances – think TVs and MP3 players.   This was back in 2006.
One day I received a call from a customer who said the owner’s manual wasn’t included in the box.  As the manual is free for download online the company policy is to direct the customer to the website and walk them through downloading it (the company doesn’t offer a print replacement manual if the original is lost or damaged).
I explained that to the caller and offered to walk them through the process. She became upset and insisted she needed a paper copy sent to her. I advised her that wasn’t possible but she could always print off a copy at home once it was downloaded. We went around like this for a bit before she snipped that she didn’t have internet in her home. I paused then offered:
“Well ma’m you could always use the internet at your local library to download the manual….”
She cut me off exclaiming: “I can’t go to the library I HAVE KIDS!”
She then hung up on me.

Seems to me if you have children you SHOULD be going to the library.

Unfiltered Story #140779

, , , | Unfiltered | February 18, 2019

I am calling people to confirm their direct debit plan to our company. A young man answers, abuses me, and hangs up on me, denying that he has signed up for our service. I reluctantly ring him back.

Me: Sir, I NEED to confirm that you did not request this payment. We have quite a few personal details for you, including your phone, address, and bank details.
Caller: If you b******s have taken a f****** penny from me, I’ll sue you all!
Me: I’m trying to determine that it’s not the case, sir.

After a few minutes of trying to get him to confirm his details, he caves.

Caller: Does the bank account even start with ##? Huh?
Me: Yes.
Caller: …really?
Me: And it ends with ##.
Caller: *contrite* Shit, that’s my number.
Me: Well, you were signed up by someone, it seems. I can see an email here for [email protected].
Caller: …I AM GOING TO KILL THAT M*****F*****, HE’S A DEAD MAN WALKING—
Me: So I’ll cancel that, then. You won’t be charged a penny. See how we worked this out when you cooperate?
Caller: F*** YOU, LADY! *hangs up*

Unfiltered Story #140775

, , | Unfiltered | February 18, 2019

I’m working in the bakery.

A customer approaches the self-serve bread slicer and looks inquisitively at it. He opens and closes the feeder door, which turns the machine on for about 8 seconds. When it stops, he checks the out feed door.
Customer: “Excuse me, are these the free cookies?”
Me: “No sir, that’s a bread slicer.”
(after he leaves, to co-worker)
Me: I do not get paid enough for this.

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