I’m a student on summer break, staying with my girlfriend, who is a freelancer. it just so happens that we’re home around noon when the doorbell rings. I’m opening the door in my underwear to find two guys my age dressed in pristine suits, clutching bible and all.
Me: What?
Jehova’s witness #1: We’d like to talk to you about God?
Girlfriend’s voice from the back of the apartment: Oooh honey, not before breakfast!
Jehovas are dumbfounded enough for me to quietly close the door in their faces, me smiling amicably.

*I work in a central answering point for the city and take a wide variety of calls. This often requires us to narrow down what the person is calling about in order to direct them. Note – I am female.*

Me: *answers phone with standard greeting*
Woman Caller: I need to talk to Engineering!
Me: You are speaking with Engineering. How can I help you?
Caller: NO, I NEED TO SPEAK TO ENGINEERING! *this usually means they want to talk to a man*
Me: What are you looking to speak to them about?
Caller: You can’t help me. I need to talk about a tree and a city line! *this could be several issues, all of which we create work orders for, including a sewer problem, needing to find the water line or having a city tree cut down*
Me: Ok, what issue are you having with the tree?
Caller: THAT’S IT! I KNEW YOU COULDN’T HELP! NEVERMIND! *hangs up*
Me: …

(I work as an assistant at a small academic publisher. As part of my duties, I have to cover the front desk for an hour and a half each day while the receptionist goes and does a mail run and some other tasks that take her away from the office. I work the front desk the same time gap almost every single day.)

Caller who knows the receptionist: Hi, is this [Coworker]?

Me: No, this is [my name]. [Coworker] will be back after 1:00.

Caller: Okay, thanks.

(Then, inevitably, the caller tries back before 1:00 and I have to tell them the same thing. She gets a call like this almost daily.)

My female manager is training a new male co-worker, and are in the lobby of our museum, when a guest approaches my co-worker.

Customer: “Excuse me, sir?”

Manager: “Hi, is there anything I can help you with?”

Customer: “Excuse me, SIR.”

Co-worker: “Um…”

Customer: “How much is it to get in?”

Co-worker: “Uh…”

Manager: “It’s [price] for adults, and [price] for children.”

Customer: “Fine.”

The customer leaves, and my co-worker and manager were left bewildered.

Co-worker: “That was rude. You greeted her and everything. Why did she want to bypass a manager just to talk to a male employee?”

Manager: “Some people are just stupid, that’s all.”

(In our Grade 10 Advanced English class, they rolled out some new province-wide standardized tests to gauge the literacy level of Ontario students. The test was actually pretty difficult but I gave it my best shot.

A few weeks later we all got our results back, and, unfamiliar with this new system of grading I was disappointed with my score.)

Me: *loud and jokingly* “Aw, I only got a 4.”
*looks around at other students’ papers, I’m seeing a mix of 2’s and 3’s.. everyone is dead silent with their gazes down.*

4 turns out to be the highest-tier score, equivalent to a University-level comprehension of the English language, and I suddenly feel very .. sheepish.