Unfiltered Story #28286

Unfiltered | December 31, 2016

(My friend and I sitting together in class. This was back when kids would write on each other’s notebooks all the time. My friend’s notebook is laying there, so I take my pen and begin to write on it.)

Friend: “What are you doing?!”

Me: “Um, writing you a note?”

Friend: *snatching it* “Never do that, ever again!”

(I was confused because I had done this before and she didn’t complain then. And she had done it to mine.)

Me: “Uh, sorry…”

Friend: *reading* “And what is this? ‘HITHER.’ What the h*** does that mean?!”

Me: “It was ‘Hi There’. But you didn’t let me finish.”

Friend: *glaring*

Me: “Um…can I–?”

(She grabs her stuff and leaves. Next semester, I was glad when we didn’t have any classes together if she was going to be a b*tch. I made new friends that didn’t care if I wrote on their books.)

Unfiltered Story #18586

Unfiltered | December 30, 2016

It’s 3AM and I was travelling home from my girlfriend’s house, after having spent the last few hours there. My route takes me down a main arterial road, and then on to a freeway for about 10 minutes before I arrive in my town.

As I was driving, I noticed a van parked up just shy of the traffic lights on the freeway off-ramp, and a man walking around his van on the phone. He had his bonnet up, and the hazard warning lights on as well. I thought to myself “What a hell of a place to break down”.

I joined the freeway, and took the next exit to turn around and go back to the broken down van. I pulled up next to him and asked “Are you alright ?” He responds “Do you have a jumper cable?”
I always carry jumper leads in my car in case of an emergency, so I pulled up in front of his van and connected the leads, and revved up the engine on my car. The van wouldn’t start though. It just sounded like it was turning over with no power. I revved the engine in my car up harder, to 5000 rpm in the hope that there would be enough power generated to start the big old van, but it still refused to start.

After verifying if he had road-assist (which he did not), I suggested that we at least push the van off the freeway ramp, and get it to the on-ramp about 40 meters away, where there is a downhill grade, and we could try bump starting the van.

The two of us pushed the van over the junction and got some momentum going. I shouted to him “Put it in 2nd gear and dump the clutch!” The van finally roared into life! I told him to drive for a long while, to allow the battery to re-charge itself.

I hope that whenever I need help, and I am stranded on the side of the road, someone will pull over to help me, should I ever need it.

Unfiltered Story #32585

Unfiltered | December 30, 2016

Note that the class is in classroom 2

Teacher: I’m going to classroom 2

Me: you’re going to classroom 2

Teacher: yes

As she is walking out of the room

Me: so where are you going

Teacher: Classroom 2

Classmate: Did she say classroom 2

Unfiltered Story #67402

Unfiltered | December 30, 2016

I work as a cashier in a busy retail superstore. It’s drawing closer to Christmas, so the atmosphere is growing ever more frantic and customers, bless them, are becoming even more clueless than usual. The following exchange happens several times a day.

Customer- “Is your till open?”

Me- “Yes ma-am”

(I quickly scan her items)

Me- “Right, that comes to £37.34. Would you also like a 5p ba-”

Customer- “How much was my total??”

Me- “£37.34. Would you like one of our 5p bags too?”

Customer- “How much are they?”

Me- “They’re 5p. Would you like one?”

Customer- “No.”

(I see she has her card out and is looking for the chip and pin machine, conveniently located an inch away from her hands)

Me- “The card machine is just here, ma-am, it’s ready for you to put your card in.”

(The customer puts her card in and stares at the screen telling her to enter her pin)

Me- “…You may now enter your pin.”

(She continues to stare)

Me- “…Ok, it’s ready for you to enter your pin, if you just type it in and press the green button…”

(Thankfully, she does so)

Me- “Thank you! Here’s your items and receipt, have a lovely evening!”

(She walks off without a reply)

Unfiltered Story #47975

Unfiltered | December 30, 2016

New Years Eve, some five-ish years ago, my parents’ home group from church and their kids all met at a local baseball field at night to set off fireworks. (Isolated location, no chance of bothering anyone)

I was helping some of the older boys (by which I mean probably 17 years old) set up stands to shoot the bottle rockets, and one of them had the idea of tying two of the little “cherry bomb” types together by the fuses, then putting them in the launch tube.

We all stood back at the edge of the field as one of the guys lit it, then ran. Suddenly, the girl standing next to me muttered, “Uh oh.”
Shortly followed by, “Ohhhh no.”

The stand had tipped over.

When the fuse burned down, the tube tipped over and sent the fireworks shooting out across the field. The boys had to run out and stamp out three tiny fires we started.

…and yet for some reason we were still allowed to light the fireworks.