(My grandfather has just come to my house to drop off one of my brothers after getting back from a fishing trip. My brothers are all outside, the one who went fishing getting his tackle box and the other two climbing in the boat to play. Neither of our parents are home and I am babysitting. My grandfather and I are inside talking. I am asexual and my grandfather is the only family member who knows this.)

Grandfather: “It’s nice out there. Not too warm, just a little humid.”

Me: “I wouldn’t know; I haven’t been out there since I mowed the lawn this morning.”

Grandpa: “Oh, yeah, I was going to tease you about that. The lines aren’t straight.”

Me: “Well, neither am I.”

I was on a trip to see the Czech republic (because that is where my stepdad is from) when we went into a nice little hole in the wall pub where my mom was laughing and enjoying herself after eating and tipping we started walking when a man saw that my mom pet a homeless man’s dog but didn’t give him change, he proceeded to swear at her in Czech saying that she was a heartless bi**h. My stepdad and her husband who is from the country and therefore speaks the language told him in that same one HELLO HANZA man turns around to look at my stepdad, we had just had lunch with his parents this morning as we are good friends. After apologizing to my mother he turns around to get hit in the face by a road sign… what you reap is what you sow

I work in the 911 system in my city. Every so often we get a job that makes us go “what the ***”?!?” This is one of them:

So we got a job for the unconscious. We get there and sure enough, he is unresponsive from his sugar being too low. It’s a pretty straight forward call and not that unusual. We wake him up with IV dextrose and that’s where the strange begins.

The patient and I are chatting back and forth. Suddenly he changes he subject:

Patient: “you know what? I think in the future cars will melt.”

Me: “huh? I’m not sure I’m following you, what do you mean?”

Patient: “yeah, like cats will melt into walls. So to get from one place to another your car will just melt into a wall.”

Me: “what do you mean?”

Patient: “so like the car in on the roof, right? And it just melts into the building through the ceiling. And then, like, everything the car melts into, becomes yours. Like a car epidemic.”

He continues to rattle on about the melting feature. My partner and I just share looks because we are both very confused. I’m not sure if he was trying to describe something else, and didn’t mean melt, or if he literally meant melt. It was definitely strange.

*note: yes, I realize the patient likely had some sort of psychological problem as well as being diabetic. I am not trying to make fun of his condition, ridicule him or anything like that. Just thought it was strange/interesting-definitely one of my top strange conversations with patients.*

I work in a toy and game store that sells a popular line of vynel figurines. I’m restocking and cleaning up our section of these figurines when a couple of girls come up to browse.

Girl #1: I’ve been looking everywhere for a Buckey Barnes.

(Knowing that we have exactly one of this figure left, I pull it off the shelf and turn around to face the girls)

Me: how about this one?

The girl literally steps back and yells in surprise (not loudly).

Girl #1: Oh my God! That’s amazing! I can’t believe you have it!

She hesitantly reaches out, as if she doesn’t believe it’s real. After making sure they are happy, I continue to walk around the store. Eventually they come up to the till, where I ring them through.

Girl #1: That was amazing! You just casually found it on the shelf. I’ve been looking everywhere for it. I can’t believe you had it.

She continues to laugh in amazement even as she is leaving the store. Retail can be a thankless job, but the customers that really appreciate our work and the product make it all better. Seeing this girl’s reaction and how I made her day made my own day so much better.

(I’m a transman. My name and voice are both unambiguously male. I’ve been wanting to get some wax hair removal done in an… intimate region, but between money and feeling nervous about looking for a place to do it since I’ve had no “bottom surgery” (and even if I had, it generally can’t pass for “natural”), it hasn’t happened. I have a bit more money coming in, so I take the plunge and call a nearby place. I rambled a lot due to nerves, but this was the gist of the conversation:)

Me: “Hi, so I’d like to make an appointment- I’ve never done this before, but I’m a transman, so it’s a bit awkward to talk about, and I’m worried about finding a place to get it done…”

Staff member: “It’s fine, I’m sure we can help. What is it you’re after?”

(I explain. She’s very understanding and calm, makes it clear that it’s no problem, and books me in. The next morning I’m sleeping in and am woken up by a phone call from the place.)

Staff member: “Hi, is this (my name)?”

Me: “It is.”

Staff member: “Hi, this is (name) from (salon). You made an appointment yesterday for (date)? Well… I just wanted to check that we’re able to serve you.”

Me: (Concerned at this point, and wondering if actually they are NOT comfortable) “…Yes?”

Staff member: “Well, um… Have you had… the op?”

Me: “Not the one you’re thinking of, no.”

Staff member: “Ah… I’m sorry, I’m afraid we can’t help you.” (At this point I’ve decided to ask exactly why not, but I don’t interrupt.) “I’m really sorry for the confusion, but it’s just that we’re not trained to do (wax style) for men.”

Me: “Wait- wait. What? I don’t- I have what you’d expect to see on a woman.”

Staff member: “You- OH! Oh, you have- what we would usually work on for women, not-”

Me: “Yup. Is that still a problem?”

Staff member: “Oh, no, not at all! Oh, I’m so sorry. Clearly there’s been two completely different conversations happening here- I’m so sorry for the mix up. It’s absolutely fine, we’ll see you on (date). I’m sorry again.”

(She really couldn’t seem to stop apologising and seemed to feel awful. I laughed it off, and I’m not bothered by it- but I am extremely confused. I specifically said that I was a trans MAN, and my name does not have a female counterpart. I’ll admit that I’m closer to the subject than most, but why would a trans WOMAN introduce herself as a trans MAN using a male name, in a situation where the only reason to mention it is that they’re specifically going to be working on the genital region? And if she was confused, why didn’t she… ask, instead of assuming and then being extremely embarrassed at the mistake? I’m still confused- if vaguely amused- by what conclusion, exactly, she had reached.)