Unfiltered Story #32728

Unfiltered | May 24, 2017

(There is this one student in our class who is extremely annoying. Every time the teacher asks a question, he always blurts out the answer before anyone else has a chance to. He often finishes our teacher’s sentences and interrupts our lessons. Finally, our teacher got fed up with him.)

Teacher: *writing on the markerboard as the student interrupts him again* Fine. Do you want to teach the class today? *throws the student his marker*

Student #1: (the annoying one) Ummmm…..

Student #2: Hey, do you want me to be teacher instead? I’ll be teacher!

Student #1: Okay… *throws Student #2 the marker*

*Student #2 walks up to the markerboard, writes ‘Field Trip’ on the board*

Student #2: Field trip everyone! *walks out of the classroom*

(When he came back, our teacher just gave him a high five and laughed. Now our teacher occasionally lets some of us teach the lesson of the day, but he will never let Student #2 be teacher again…)

Unfiltered Story #57180

Unfiltered | May 24, 2017

I am in the middle of punching in a stocktake in our back office when I hear myself being paged to go down to the front counter. As soon as I am on hte shop floor I have customers pretty much lined up to ask me where stock is, I hear myself getting paged again. When I finally get to the counter Isee just one customer. We always get customers trying to get our more expensive fabrics cheaper, they pull the price tag off.

Cashier “Great you are finally here, I have this fabric, the barcode has been crossed out and I need a price check.”

Me “Have you checked the fabric tables?” *we all usually do our own checks.

Cashier “Uh no”

Me “Ok I’ll do it, I know there’s one with the correct code because I wrote the code on the roll myself, there’s nothing on that roll?”

Cashier ” No. nothing, not even a price, customer says it should be $9/”

Me “No that’s $25”

*I go to the fabric area and find the other roll of the same fabric, there’s nothing on it either. so I take it to the counter trying to remember what the fabric is called.

Cashier “Oh great you found it, what’s the code?”

Me “There’s no code on this either,” *I pick up the original roll she had and look at the crossed out bar code and then notice in my writing next to it a 6 digit number, I key the number in. “There you go, it’s (brand name) at $25.” *the customer finally gets served and leaves the store.

Cashier ” How did you do that”

Me “The code is right there, next to the price”

Cashier “Oh I wondered what those numbers were”.

Me “You told me there was nothing on the roll”

Cashier “It was only 6 numbers, how am I to know it was the code?”

Me “We always use a six digit code so we don’t have to put in the whole barcode”

Cashier ” Oh I forgot”

I guess we should have reminded her about the codes sometime in the 2 years she’d been working for us.

Unfiltered Story #67540

Unfiltered | May 24, 2017

(I am just a security officer at the LAX airport. A women in her mid 80’s approached the check in desk.

Elderly Lady: Where is this plane going?

Check In: Excuse Me?

Elderly lady: I said where is this plane going?

Check in: It should say that right on your boarding pass.

Elderly Lady: I only know the address to where I am going.

Check In: This flight is going to Toronto

Elderly lady: IS thornhill in toronto?

Check In: Let me get my manager.

(The last I heard before I got on the flight I heard the manager trying to explain to her where Toronto and where thornhill

Unfiltered Story #28422

Unfiltered | May 24, 2017

(I am a Senior Patrol Leader in my Boy Scout troop, which basically means that I am responsible for almost everything in the troop. It was a standard meeting until I noticed a woman with her 17 something year old girl come into our meeting place. I think that they are simply the parents and sibling of one of our members, so I think nothing of it until the meeting closes and everyone packs up to go home.)

Woman: *marches over to me* I want my daughter to join your Boy Scout troop.

Me: *flabbergasted* Wait, what? You–

Woman: Exactly what I said. I want my daughter to join your Boy Scout troop.

Me: Um, I don’t think that is physically possible unless you know, your child gets, I don’t know, a gender switch?

Woman: What?

Me: You know, when someone doesn’t want to be a specific gender and they want to change—

Woman: I know exactly what a gender switch is, but that was nothing to do with that. I just want my daughter to join your Boy Scout troop.

Me: *completely done by this point* Uh, I hope you know what the “Boy” in Boy Scout stands for, right?

Woman: *blank stare*

Me: Miss, are you—

Woman: *irate* This is unacceptable. I DEMAND to see your superior.

Me: Uh, sure.

(I call over my Scoutmaster. The woman is absolutely nuts at this point, tearing her own hair and hitting the walls while my Scoutmaster tries to calm her down.)

Me: *packing up my own things so I can go home*

Woman: *screaming now* THIS IS SEXIST. I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU WON’T LET MY DAUGHTER JOIN YOUR BOY SCOUT PATROL!

(Note: My Scoutmaster is a retired marine due to his age and is very proficient in martial arts.)

Woman: *SWINGS at my Scoutmaster* LET MY DAUGHTER JOIN, LET MY—

(My Scoutmaster instinctively blocks the attack and after a quick tussle, ends up on top of her while pinning her arms underneath her, making it impossible for her to move. At this point, everyone is staring at her. At this point, one of the parents, who is a cop, walks over.)

Cop Parent: Alright, [Scoutmaster], no need to sprain your back, I got it from here.

Me: *talking to the 17 year old girl* Was she actually serious?

Girl: Yeah, she thought I was useless around the house despite being the only one in our family working so she wanted me to join Boy Scouts. What a f****** moron.

(Best part? The girl and I realized we went to the same high school and we started hitting it off. The second best part? When she showed up to court for attempted assault and disturbance of the peace, her daughter said this to her face, “Frankly, she was always over zealous about other’s actions, but never considered her own. Personally, she deserves it.”)

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Unfiltered Story #32723

Unfiltered | May 23, 2017

I was volunteering in a first grade classroom when I was in high school or early college, 2007-2008 or so when I had this exchange with a child.

Student runs up to me on the playground: “[me] can a girl marry a girl?”

Me, caught totally off guard, stammering: uhh….uhhh, well, it depends what state you live in

Student, thinks hard: well, what about in Massachusetts?

Me, still not sure if I should be taking the conversation in this direction: well…yes!

Student: hmmmmmmm…(thinking very hard), I don’t want to marry a girl

Me, my brain finally catching up with my mouth: “you can marry whoever you want!!’

Child runs off, happy as a clam. I later became a teacher and much faster at answering children’s insane questions less awkwardly and with honest and loving answers from the beginning of a conversation instead of at the end.