My cell phone’s text alert goes off.

Me: Do you like my Kim Possible ringtone?

Aunt: I wondered where I had heard that from! I remember that show! Do you know what I watched today? Toy Story 4

This began a long discussion about the Toy Story and The Little Mermaid franchises.

My older 2 children (3 yr old boy &5 yr old girl) were in the bath while I was dealing with my younger one just outside the door.
I could here them laughing and playing but wasn’t really listening to what they were saying until I heard my daughter say
“Will you just stand still and let me take a look”
I looked up to see what was happening and I see my daughter holding my son’s penis, looking at it very closely.
Me- “(daughter), what are you doing?”
Son, with the most horrified look on his face,-“Mummy, there’s a hole in the end of my noodle!!”
Me, very quickly, trying to keep a straight face. – “Yes it’s where the wee comes out so leave it alone”

Trigger warning: mentions of suicide and self harm.

I have been dealing with suicidal thoughts for a number of months, and my guidance counselor suggested reaching out to teen health center to get professional counselling. I called in May 2015, and was finally accepted for an appointment at the beginning of October. My counselor suggested that I keep a thought journal and bring it to her for our next meeting, scheduled for two weeks later. I do as she asks and bring it into the next appointment, trying to hand it to her.

Counselor: I don’t want to read that. You need to read it to me.

I read it out loud very reluctantly, feeling very exposed and triggered.

Counselor: Well, you aren’t bad enough to admit to hospital. When things get bad you just have to remind yourself of the reasons why you shouldn’t commit suicide.

Me: that’s a lot easier said than done.

Counselor: well if you commit suicide, I’ll lose my license, so be smart.

The appointment ended shortly after that. Thanks to my guidance counselor, who was very perceptive and caring, I got the help that I needed from a counselor at a different location and am doing much better.

I answer the phone.
Customer: Do you guys have (dog food)?
Me: Hmm I don’t think so but let me double check.
I ask my manager who informs me that our company hasn’t sold that brand of dog food for at least two years.
Me: Hi, sorry, we don’t sell that brand anymore.
Customer: well I just bought some from you a month ago.
Me: We haven’t sold it for a couple of years. Could it be (other pet store) you bought it from?
Customer: No, it was you guys. Are you just too lazy to go check?
Me: We don’t sell that brand. I’ve worked here for almost two years and I’ve never seen it on our shelves.
Customer: Well, I’m calling corporate to complain…
Me: Ok.
I hang up.

(I have finished my shower and dressed, gone into the kitchen where my mother is to get a bottle of water and stop to talk for a few minutes. I then return to my computer, where a friend of mine has sent me images she managed to capture through a strong telescope of Saturn early that same morning. I send one to my mom in a messenger app and go to tell her about it.)

Me: Isn’t it cool? Check it out, and for non-professional equipment, it’s a REALLY good picture.

Mom: Yeah, it kind of is. (She pauses and looks at me.) Have you even had your shower yet?

Me: …really, mother? You saw me walk into the bathroom, then back out fifteen minutes later, I walked in here, I spoke to you, you saw my wet hair, and you’re asking if I’ve taken a shower yet?

Mom: (Realizing how silly it was to ask, and motioning for me to leave) Get out of my kitchen, you’re bothering me.