Underpinning Their Own Stupidity

(We aren’t allowed to know customers’ personal identification numbers. If they disclose them, we have to issue new ones, blocking their current ones and starting a seven-day wait for a new one to be sent.)

Me: “Okay, you’ll need your PIN to set up online banking. Without telling me what it is, can you tell me if you know your PIN?”

Caller: “Why can’t I say my PIN?”

Me: “It’s your secure PIN. You shouldn’t disclose it to anyone, not even me. If you do, I’m required to replace it. That will delay what you want to do today. So, please don’t tell me what it is. Do you know your PIN? Just yes or no will be fine.”

Caller: “My PIN is [number]. I forbid you to replace it.”

Me: “Ma’am, I asked you not to tell me, and I explained why. I have to replace it now. I am truly sorry. It will take up to seven business days for you to receive it by mail.”

Caller: “DON’T YOU DARE! I NEED ONLINE BANKING TO WORK TODAY!”

Me: “Ma’am, I did explain this. I also have no option. I’m now required to replace your PIN for security.”

Caller: “But I need this set up today! It’s urgent!”

Me: “Ma’am, you clearly understood me. Can I ask, why did you tell me your PIN after I asked you not to?”

Caller: “I DON’T LIKE BEING TOLD WHAT TO DO!”

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