Undergarment Overreaction, Part 2

(My boyfriend of over a year has just graduated college. He has a thing for brand new socks, but buys them rarely for himself because he’s fairly thrifty. I get him a congratulations card and a bag of new socks for his last day of school. We’ve had several joking conversations that if we ever wanted to break up, we could just do it with a sock as a throwback to ‘Harry Potter.’)

Me: “Hey, you! I got you this since you finished school.”

Boyfriend: *reads card* “Aw, that’s nice!” *sees the bag of socks* “Wait… is this… really?”

Me: “What? NO! I’m not breaking up with you; I thought you just liked socks!”

Boyfriend: “Master has presented me with a sock! Boyfriend is FREE!”

Me: “Not so! Even Dumbledore himself said there’s nothing like a fresh, new pair of socks!”

Boyfriend: “FREEEEE!”