Ultrasound And Ultra Secure

(I am four months pregnant. My boyfriend and I are discussing whether we should learn the sex of the baby.)

Boyfriend: “I think we should know. How else are we supposed to prepare for it?”

Me: “I just don’t want to know the baby’s sex until it’s born. If we check now, it will ruin the surprise.”

Boyfriend: “What are we supposed to tell everyone at the baby shower?”

Me: “We can tell them we don’t know what the baby is going to be.”

Boyfriend: “What if the family wants to bring gifts?”

Me: “They can buy gender neutral gifts.”

Boyfriend: “I actually want to know the baby’s sex.”

Me: “Well, I don’t.”

Boyfriend: “I have an Idea.”

Me: “What?”

Boyfriend: “You can get an ultrasound and I’ll tell the doctor you don’t want to see it. I’ll know what the baby will be but you won’t and we can see if there are any problems.”

Me: “That’s a great idea. Let’s try it. I’ll make the appointment.”

(One week later I get my ultrasound. The doctor and my boyfriend watch the screen and look confused and frustrated.)

Me: “Is everything okay?”

Doctor: “Yes, everything is going well. I don’t see any complications.”

(The doctor and my boyfriend continue to stare at the screen and look like they’re getting impatient.)

Me: “Can someone tell me what’s going on?”

Boyfriend: “You should see this.”

Me: “I told you I don’t want to know the sex of the baby until it’s born.”

Boyfriend: “I promise you won’t.”

Me: “Okay, show me what you’ve been watching, but only for a second.”

(The doctor turns the screen towards me and right there in clear view is my baby… with its legs crossed in a way that makes it impossible to see the genitals. We ended up waiting until the birth to find out the baby’s sex. It’s a boy.)