Trumps All Other Answers

(My mother is a teacher at a Montessori elementary school. A lot of the kids have sort of out-there parents, so it’s not unusual for her to hear them say some pretty wacky stuff. It’s the end of the day, and one of the other teachers has just finished reading a picture book about all the presidents of the United States.)

Teacher: “And next November, we will elect a new president. Whoever gets elected will be in books like this, just like all the other presidents from the past.”

(One of the kids raises his hand.)

Kid #1: “Who’s gonna try to be president?”

Teacher: “Many people try, but right now there are two people who are most likely to be president. Their names are Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump.”

(Another kid pipes up. He has a pronounced lisp and a very loud speaking voice.)

Kid #2: “I know about Trump! My mommy talks about him when he’s on the TV!”

Teacher: “Yes, a lot of people are talking about—”

Kid #2: “She says that he’s an ath hold.”

Teacher: *confused* “A what?”

Kid #2: “An ath hold! Ath hold!”

(After a moment, the teacher realizes what the kid is trying to say through his lisp and tries frantically to get him to stop saying it. By this point some of the parents have come in to pick up their kids, only to find a panicking teacher and a child gleefully shouting the word “a**hole.”)