Trial By Telephone Wire

Caller: “I keep getting calls from you people and I want them to stop!”

Me: “Ma’am, what are the calls regarding?”

Caller: “I don’t know! They say they want to verify who they’re calling?”

Me: “Is it as though the caller doesn’t know who they’re calling?”

Caller: “Yes, and I want them to stop”

Me: “Well, ma’am, I can certainly connect you to our do-not-call line. All you have to do is listen to the prompt and hit the appropriate key.”

(The caller continues to go on a tirade, which turns out to be about a different company than the one I work for. Literally every second word is a curse. I finally decide to cut in and stop her.)

Me: *very politely* “Ma’am, you’re calling [Company]. We have nothing to do with [Other Company] and any calls they might be giving you. However, I would be happy to get you the phone number for [Other Company] if you would wait a moment.”

Caller: *pauses a moment* “Oh… oh, my gosh. I am so sorry! You…  were so nice! Why were you so nice to me? I was swearing at you!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’ve worked at three different call centers, and nothing will ever compare to what people called me in tech support.”

Caller: “Oh, okay. That makes sense!”