Toying With Their Relationship

(My girlfriend and I are both female. She is religiously Jewish, while I am a Christian-raised atheist. Her family is perfectly comfortable with our relationship, and a few of them will tease us lightly about our sex life. We are having a conversation about Jewish religious prohibitions against certain types of children’s toys during Shabbos—The Jewish Sabbath.)

Girlfriend’s Sister: “So, ‘muktzah toys,’ are things you’re not allowed to play with on Shabbos. Like battery-operated things.”

Girlfriend’s Mother: “You know those really obnoxious toys that go WOOOEEEEOOOO BING BING BING! And they are always filled with flashing lights? Every Shabbos, you get to say they’re not allowed and get a break.”

Girlfriend: “Well, our kids just aren’t going to have any ‘muktzah toys,’ so it won’t be an issue.”

Girlfriend’s Sister: “Well, that’s not fair. You get ‘muktzah toys!'”

(There is a brief pause while we all figure out what battery-operated toys for grown-ups she’s talking about, and then we all break down laughing.)

Me: “Actually, I don’t think we have any that go, ‘WEEOOOEEEOOOEEEOO!'”

Girlfriend’s Sister: *whose bedroom is next to ours* “BARUCH HASHEM!” *meaning: Praise God!*