Totally Useless Humor

, , | Right | September 11, 2020

I work in a secondhand/thrift store. I’m approached by a teenage girl.

Teenager: “You work here? Come with me.” 

I don’t even get the chance to say a word before she walks past me and leads me to the furniture aisle, where her mother is waiting with a lamp in her hand.

Me: “You had a question, ma’am?”

Mother: “Yes. I want to buy this lamp along with this side table over here, but the lamp is a bit wobbly, see?”

She shakes the lamp hood which wobbles a teeny bit.

Mother: “I want a discount! Can I pay [price] for the set?”

Me: “Well, as it is a store with used and secondhand products, there can be slight imperfections. And since we already are giving you the lowest price possible, I think, we usually don’t do a lot of discounting. But I’m not the one doing the pricing on these things. You can ask my more qualified coworkers by the counter—”

The mother cuts me off and talks to her daughter.

Mother: “Honey, you dragged the wrong one here!”

Teenager: “So you are completely useless!”

They both smile as if it’s a joke. I don’t think calling someone ”useless” is a joke.

Me: “Or I could walk to the back storage and ask my supervisor. Just a second.”

I walk to the back, which is closer for me to walk to than the front counter, anyway, and go to my supervisor. I am glad I don’t have to deal with them anymore.

Me: “[Supervisor], can you go help these ladies there with a question about a lamp and a table?”

She goes out to help them while I resume my usual work in the storage. My supervisor comes back and seems pleased. 

Me: “Did you give them the discount?”

Supervisor: “Oh, yes! They were so polite about it, I thought, ‘Why not?’” 

Me: “Well, at least I’m glad they treated you politely. When I couldn’t provide them the answer they wanted, the girl called me ‘useless.’”

Supervisor: *Eyes narrowing* “They did? Oh, my… Now I regret that discount.”

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