Totally InDane

, , , , | Right | March 7, 2020

It’s relevant to know something about us Danes, something that makes certain other cultures view us as a bit cold and unfriendly: we like our personal space. We don’t like when our little bubble is invaded. We like to be left alone, and an unwanted intrusion is generally unwelcome. Keep to yourself and don’t cause trouble, basically.

It’s also worth pointing out that in Aarhus, unlike everywhere else in Denmark, passengers board the bus at the rear and exit at the front, or if the bus has a door in the middle, board in the middle and exit at the front and rear.

This particular bus has doors in the middle. On this ride, the bus is somewhat packed. There are no seats left, leaving only room for standing passengers, of which there are already quite a few. At one of the downtown stops, three boys, maybe 13 or 14, get on, and they immediately start causing trouble.

They are talking loudly to each other, have music blaring from a mobile phone, run up and down the bus, bump into other passengers, and talk rudely about certain passengers. Everyone else does the Danish thing and remains silent rather than doing anything about it.

As the bus steadily trundles toward the outer neighbourhoods of the city, it approaches a stop where a sitting passenger has to get up. In order for her to get out, an elderly lady with a crutch has to get up from her seat, a somewhat slow procedure. The departing passenger gets out, and before the elderly lady can sit back down, two of the three boys rush in and take the two seats.

The lady tells them, “Excuse me, I was sitting there.”

The boy now sitting in her seat tells her, “So what? Now it’s mine! Buzz off!”

Everyone around them looks miffed but does nothing, apart from one guy who helpfully offers up his seat. All this time, the driver has been waiting for the lady to be seated, watching everything in the rear-view mirror, and hearing everything as well as the boys, who are loud enough for everyone to hear. The elderly lady now seated, the bus sets off again.

However, having left the third boy standing in the front of the bus causing mischief, they soon abandon the seats to join their friend, leaving two other passengers to take the seats. Eventually, the boys wind up in the middle of the bus.

As the bus approaches a minor industrial area with nothing of interest, except to those who work there, it starts slowing down. To those of us who can see the next stop, this seems strange. No one has pressed “STOP” and there are no passengers waiting to board. The bus then comes to a halt at the stop, the middle doors open, and a voice comes on the tannoy:

“Would someone please throw those three baboons off the bus?”

In a split second, a few other passengers grab the boys by their arms or collars and more or less yank them out of the bus with enough force that they almost lose their balance, and with the doors closing, the bus sets off again, leaving the boys stranded in one of the most boring areas of Aarhus until the next bus comes by.

Strictly legal? Perhaps not. People actually cheer, though. Karma’s a b****.

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