Totally In The Dark About Being Totally In The Dark

, , , , , | Working | July 31, 2019

(It is back in the early 2000s. I’m working on my thesis — which I have thankfully backed up on three different devices — when my laptop screen goes black. There’s nothing but a big, black screen of digitized death. I try the customary restarting the computer and no luck. Praying for any help, I call the brand’s IT department. After sitting on hold for a rather long time, the IT guy picks up and we go through the usual spiel. I keep explaining over and over again that there is nothing — absolutely nothing — I can see on the screen as it is black. He then asks me to try some software fixes. After giving me the instruction on how to navigate to the command dialogue box:)

Me: “Okay, so, the computer screen is about [dimensions]; where do you think the box would be?”

IT: *repeats instructions*

Me: “You don’t get this. My screen is completely blacked out. I can’t see anything.”

IT: *giving up on this* “Let’s try remote connecting.”

(I know where this is going, but I can’t seem to get this through his head.)

IT: *provides instruction on remote connecting* “Now you just have to click to accept.”

Me: “Okay, so, where would that be on the screen? Middle, top, two inches down from the right-hand side?”

(I end up clicking random spaces. Somehow, by sheer luck and this guy’s determination, after three failed remote connections I manage to click the box that allows him to remotely connect.)

IT:Oh, wow! The screen is completely black.”

Me: *head to desk* “I know. I’ve been trying to tell you this.”

IT: “You’ll have to send it to us for repair or replacement.”

(I really wish we could have started there.)

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