Totally Bugging Out

(It is a hot and buggy day, and a guest enters with her friend. They are talking loudly, and make a beeline for the elevators. With their backs turned to me, I see a large spider hanging on the back of the guest. The guest is oblivious because she keeps talking to her friend, who doesn’t notice.)

Me: “Excuse me! Excuse me, ma’am!”

(The guest ignores me and disappears in the elevator.)

(I don’t think anything of it until a few minutes later; I get a call from her room.)

Me: “Hello, guest services. How may I help you?”

Guest: “Yes, you can help me by giving me a refund RIGHT NOW!”

Me: “What’s the problem, ma’am?”

Guest: “I’ll tell you what’s the problem! I didn’t pay $200 for a room that has BUGS! I just came back and laid down and then found a BUG on my pillow!”

Me: “Oh, I’m very sorry about that, ma’am.”

Guest: “You better be! This is outrageous! You all are THEIVES!”

Me: “Well, I’ll just send the manager up to help you.”

Guest: “Fine! I’m not lying!”

(I send the manager up and he comes back later to say that there was a spider on the guest’s pillow. He described it and sure enough, it was the exact same spider the guest had brought in with her from outside. It had crawled into her hair, and got smashed on her pillow! The manager explained this to her, but the guest didn’t believe it, and called us all liars and con artists.)