Too Much “Happy”

, | Working | April 24, 2018

(I’m in a fitting room when I notice something odd about the store music: Pharrell Williams’s “Happy” is playing, but instead of the full song, it’s some weird karaoke version. It’s basically background vocalists repeating, “Because I’m happy,” on a six-second loop. Over the time I’m in the fitting room, I come to realize that the karaoke version has gone on for far longer than the actual song and shows no signs of stopping. Later, I find an employee. The song is still playing, and it’s been about 20 minutes since I first noticed it.)

Me: “Excuse me?”

Employee: *turns around with a look of utmost despair*

Me: “So… About the music…”

Employee: “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. We can’t do anything about it. It’s been like this since we opened. No one can figure out why it won’t stop.”

Me: “Oh. I’m sorry. At least the store’s closing soon, right?”

Employee: “That’s the only thing keeping me from running out the door right now.”

(I tried to continue shopping, but the song was just too annoying. I left without buying anything, feeling sorry for the employees who couldn’t do the same. To this day, that song makes me cringe.)

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