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Those Free Hot Wings Really Add Up!

, , , , , | Working | September 27, 2020

My boyfriend and I order fried chicken one night, but after it arrives, we realise that our order is missing two hot wings, so I call up to see if they can be delivered or refunded. I tell the customer service rep we’re missing food, thinking it will be a simple conversation. Nope. Note that I am FTM transgender, so my voice sounds “female” while my name is definitely male.

Rep: “Could I get the order number, please?”

After fumbling for a minute to find it on the ridiculously long receipt…

Me: “Sorry for the wait; the number is [number].”

Rep: “Okay, could I get the full name on the account, please?”

Me: “That would be [Male Name] [Last Name].”

Rep: “And the address, please?”

Me: “The billing address or the delivery address?”

Rep: “Yes.”

Me: “…”

After about thirty seconds of awkward silence:

Rep: “The delivery address, please.”

Me: “Sure, that’s [address].”

Rep: “And could I get your phone number, please?”

I start reeling off a number only to realise it’s my mother’s number. It’s about nine pm after a busy day, so I guess I had a brain fart.

Me: “Wait, no, sorry. That’s my mum’s number. My number is—”

I get halfway through before the rep interrupts me.

Rep: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I can’t proceed with this call because you’ve failed the security questions. Are you sure this is your account? Could you give me the account holder’s name again, please?”

I’m annoyed at myself, flustered because I messed up my own number, and confused as to why a fried chicken chain has security questions. My full name includes three very masculine middle names chosen for me by my mother when I legally changed it.

Me: “I am the account holder. My full name is [Full Name]. That’s my name; this is my account.”

Rep: “Oh… Okay, and what was the item missing from your order, ma’am?”

Me: “Two hot wings.”

I ask my boyfriend quietly if he really wants the hot wings, to which he replies the negative. I decide to give the rep another chance before giving up. My mistake.

Rep: “Well, actually, you didn’t order any hot wings, and they aren’t on your receipt so you weren’t charged for them.”

Me: “I’m looking at the online receipt and the paper receipt that was stapled to our order, and both of them say, ‘1x two extra hot wings for £1.29.’”

Rep: “Oh… Well, I can’t give you a refund because—”

Me: *Interrupting* “You know what? I’m just going to do this online if that’s okay.”

Rep: “Yes, I was just about to suggest that you do it online.”

Me: “Great, thank you.”

I hung up without a goodbye, the closest thing to rude my English upbringing allows me to do.

I then went onto the app, found the online customer service option, and got my money refunded in roughly forty-five seconds. I get that the rep had a script to follow, but seriously, who tries to defraud a restaurant for £1.29?

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