This Tea Grows On A Cliff, But This Guy Just Fell Off One
I work in a specialty tea shop in a tourist-heavy historic district. I’m working a quiet afternoon shift when a couple walks in, mid-argument. The man is trying to impress the woman with his “knowledge” of tea.
Customer: “We’re looking for that… what’s it called… that super rare tea that only grows on cliffs or something?”
Me: “Ah, you might mean Da Hong Pao. Grows on Wuyi mountain cliffs in China.”
Customer: “Yeah, that! We’ll take a cup. Two pounds, actually!”
Me: “We don’t sell that by the cup, and, unfortunately, we don’t carry the authentic kind; it’s extremely rare and costs several thousand per ounce. Most of what’s sold under that name is a cultivar or blend.”
Customer: *Smirking at his friend but speaking to me.* “Oh, so you don’t have the rarest tea in the world? Guess this isn’t a real tea shop, huh?”
Me: “We stock teas, not flexes.”
His lady friend actually snort-laughed, while he glared at me and walked out very briskly. His friend gave me a silent thumbs-up and followed him at a slower pace.