This Manager Makes No Concessions

My movie theater has two wings, each with a concession stand. I’m taking tickets to the wing that shows the smaller independent films, so the concession stand is closed.

Customer: “Is this concession stand open?”

I’m about to say a simple “no” when my manager, walking past (but not yet on shift), stops to say:

Manager: “There are four registers, each of which has an 8.5 by 11” sign atop it saying ‘this concession stand is closed’, and each register display says ‘register closed’. You’re standing next to a four-foot-high sign that says, “This concession stand is closed. Please visit our main concession stand. Thank you!”

Customer: “I was just wondering! I don’t want to have to go back to the main one if I don’t need to.”

Manager: “No one is back there, and no popcorn is out. All the lights are OFF. The main concession stand is about fifty feet that way; I’m literally looking at it right now.”

Customer: “Mind your own f****** business!” *To me.* “Can you get your manager? I want to talk to them about opening this concession stand. They should both be open!”

I glance at my manager, who winks and walks to the office to sign in.

Me: “Uh… my manager is just about to sign in. Give me a minute, and I’ll call him down to talk to you.

The customer’s face when he saw who the manager was was one for the ages…