This Isn’t Even Remotely Happening

I, along with several other employees, worked fully remote for our jobs. One day, the boss decided to send everyone a text over the company chat on a Friday afternoon.

Boss: “Alright, team, upper management has decided to implement some new Return to Office policies to increase teamwork and collaboration. We’re going to be returning to the office five days a week!”

Employee #1: “I was hired as a fully remote employee. It’s in my contract.”

Employee #2: “I can’t afford to buy a car or pay for daycare with my current salary.”

Me: “We were ALL hired for full remote work. You can’t just spring this on us.”

Boss: “Well, you’d better figure out how to make it work. The company has made its decision, and it’s non-negotiable. If you want to stay with the company, I’ll see you all on Monday at the office.”

The boss then logged out for the day.

Mysteriously, everyone emailed in their notices, effective immediately. The Boss came in on Monday to a slew of “I quit” messages and panicked. We all received texts to the tune of:

Boss: “No, wait, we can figure something out!”

Employees: *Collectively.* “You told me it was non-negotiable. Now you’re trying to negotiate. So, you deliberately lied to me. Why would I want to keep working for you when I know that you can’t be trusted?”

The boss’s panic tells me this was probably a personal decision, not a higher-up’s decision, since he backpedaled so quickly when everyone on the remote team immediately bailed. I’m also sure he was sweating bullets trying to explain to the higher-ups why there was a sudden mass quitting on the books. We were all in contact with each other, and we all found jobs pretty quickly.