This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 45

Customer: “Hi. I’d like to return these pants.”

Me: “No problem. Was there anything wrong with them?”

Customer: “No, they were just the wrong size.”

Me: “Oh, would you like to exchange them for the correct size?”

Customer: “No, I don’t have time today.”

Me: “Okay.”

(I process her return. The lady paid credit, which means that it has to go back on the EXACT same card it was paid with.)

Me: “Okay, so you will get [amount] back onto your credit card. I just need to see it to make sure it matches.”

Customer: “Oh, could you tell me which one it was? I have a few.”

Me: “Sure, it was [last for digits of her credit card number].”

Customer: “Oh.” *pulls out card* “This one is cancelled, I thought I lost it.”

Me: *internal sigh* “Sorry, but I have to put it on the same card or I can give you a store credit.”

Customer: “But the card is DEACTIVATED! You cannot put it back on it! I DEMAND MY MONEY BACK!”

Me: “I know, but I have to give you a store credit…”

(She continues to fuss until my manager comes over and give me clearance to put it on her other card as long as her name matches, which it does.)

Me: “Have a nice day!”

(She then walks over to the table where the pants she just returned style was and proceeds to dig through the stack there. I go over and ask her if she wants a hand as she is destroying our neat pile. I grab her size out and hand it to her to go try on. She asks if she could leave her many bags of popcorn behind the cash desk since she did not want to hold them while she tried them on.)

Me: “Sure, no problem! Just ask for them when you are leaving!”

(At this point her children are running around the store and have dropped their whole bag of popcorn on our floor. My coworker starts to clean it up while I am cleaning up the pants tables. Her child then goes behind our cash desk to grab more popcorn.)

Me: “Hey! You can’t be behind there!”

Customer’s Kid: “This is my popcorn!”

Me: “You cannot be behind there. You need to get out! If you want your popcorn you need to ask your mom if I can get it for you! But you CANNOT be behind there!”

(The kid finally leaves as his mom comes out of the fitting room and goes to the cash desk with her new pair of pants.)

Me: “Oh, do you have the tags?” *note, all tags, price tag, description, size all have been ripped off. NOT how I gave it to her*

Customer: “No…”

Me: *sigh* “Fine, I’ll go grab another pair.” *grabs the top one from the pile*

Customer: “That’s not my size!”

Me: “I know, but I can look up your size in the computer as long as I have the pant style!”

Customer: “OKAY.”

Me: “All right, your total is [Total].” *cheaper then the pair she returned as these went on sale*

Customer: “Oh, could I have another pair?”

Me: *thinking because it’s cheaper she wants two* “Sure!” *gets a new pair* “Okay, so your price is [double].”

Customer: “What? I don’t want both. I just want this one!” *the new one*

Me: “They are the same pair.”

Customer: “Yes, but this one is cleaner!”

Me: “YOU ripped all the tags off in the fitting room!”

Customer: “I want the cleaner pair!”

Me: *just wanting to get rid of her by this point* “Fine! Your total is [total].”

Customer: “On credit.” *holds up same card she got the refund on*

Me: “Okay, insert when ready.” *customer’s card is declined* “Do you have money on the card?

Customer: “Yes, I just did a return.”

Me: “It takes up to three business days for a return on a credit card to process.”

Customer: “Okay, try my other card.”

(I try her other credit card, it declines too. Finally she decides to pay debit, and that declines too!!)

Customer: “Okay, I’ll just come back another day.”

(Needless to say we were all happy when she left.)