This Is Why We’re In A Recession

(I am about six years old. I like to play with the fake plastic credit cards they used to send in the mail with offers. I am at the register with my mom.)

Me: “Mommy, can I get this candy?”

Mom: “Sure, sweetie, just put it with the rest of the groceries.”

(She turns away and I decide to hold onto it. Once it gets to payment…)

Me: “Wait!” *holds up fake card* “I wanna pay for my candy!”

Cashier: “Sorry, kid, you’re too young for a credit card.” *looks at my mom* “How irresponsible, giving a child her age a credit card?!”

Mom: “What? That’s one of the fake ones you get in the mail!”

Cashier: “Oh, so you’re giving her one that is using a fake bank account?! That’s fraud, lady!”

(My mom tries to explain over and over, but the cashier won’t listen or so much as look at the card to see that it didn’t even have the strip on it to read the card.)

Mom: “Let me talk to your manager!”

Cashier: “Fine! Hey, [Manager], this lady is having her kid pay with a fraudulent credit card!”

Manager: “What? Let me see that.” *turns to me* “May I see your card, dear?”

Me: “Sure, mister!” *hands it over*

Manager: “[Cashier], this has a business offer on it. The kid was joking around.”

Cashier: “But, but, how would the kid pay for the candy?!”

Mom: “I would have obviously paid for it!”

Manager: “[Cashier], go on break. We’ll talk about this later.”

(My mom ended up buying two candies for me, and the manager gave us a discount for the trouble!)