Your Sense Of Direction Is Over The Hill

(I’ve just finished college for the day. My mum happens to call to ask if I’d like a lift home just as I’m leaving. My college is on a main road, on a hill. My mum’s job means that she works at different places each day, and so she could potentially be coming from either direction.)

Mum: “I’ve just finished work. Would you like picking up from college in about ten minutes?”

Me: “That would be great actually, if you don’t mind. Will you be coming up or down the hill?”

Mum: “I don’t know what you mean.”

Me: “Oh, I just want to know which side of the road you’ll be on so I know where to wait for you.”

Mum: “Well, I’ll be driving on the left, obviously.”

Me: “No mum, as in which direction will you be going in?”

Mum: “Towards home.”

Me: “Yeah, but you can get home either direction. Will you be driving towards town or towards the crossroads?”

Mum: “Neither…towards home.”

Me: “Yes, mum, I get that. You know that college is on a hill, yeah?”

Mum: “Yeah.”

Me: “Right, I just want to know whether you’ll be coming up the hill, or down the hill.”

Mum: “Well, why does it matter?”

Me: “So that I can be on the right side of the road waiting for you.”

Mum: “You’re making all this far too complicated.”

Me: “No mum, I’m really not. I’m just asking a simple question!”

Mum: “Oh, forget it. Just get the bus.”