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This Guy Is A Whole Bundle Of Red Flags

, , , , , | Romantic | November 27, 2021

I had been dating this guy for a little over a month. I have no problem with guys looking at other girls because I know that it happens even subconsciously. [Boyfriend] and I were out to dinner one night when a girl walked by in a tight dress.

Boyfriend: “You think she works out?”

Me: “Probably.”

He took my hand across the table.

Boyfriend: “We should get a girlfriend.”

I choked on my drink.

Boyfriend: “You okay?”

Me: “Why do we need a girlfriend?”

Boyfriend: “Why not?”

Me: “Because we’re monogamous.”

Boyfriend: “We don’t have to be.”

Me: “And I don’t like girls.”

Boyfriend: “Yes, you do. You talk about them all the time. Just now you were checking her out.”

Me: “Noticing that a person takes care of their body and wanting their body are two different things.”

Boyfriend: “It’s okay! I’m totally cool with bisexuality.”

Me: “Okay then, let’s get a boyfriend.”

Boyfriend: “F*** no!”

Me: “Why not? I see you looking at guys at the gym all the time.”

Boyfriend: “I’m watching their form, not their— No, no. I do not like men.”

Me: “And I do not like women.”

Boyfriend: “Look. Just give it a try. You never know; you might like it.”

Me: “Okay. I’ll try it if you will.”

Boyfriend: “Deal!”

Me: “Great. Who’s our boyfriend?”

Boyfriend: “Woah, woah, hold up. That is not what I agreed to.”

Me: *Fake confusion* “Oh. You just meant bisexuality is okay if it’s two girls. But two guys aren’t okay. Right?”

Boyfriend: “Exactly! I’m not sharing you with a dude. That’s f****** gross. Look. Let’s just try adding a girl to see how it goes. If you don’t like it, then she’ll be my other girlfriend and you don’t have to interact with her at all. Maybe she’ll be a girl who likes girls and she can teach you!”

I stared at him, waiting for him to say it was a joke or something. When he didn’t, I got up and left him with the bill. Since I drove us there, I also left him without a ride home. I blocked his number and all his social media accounts before I got home. Sometimes I wonder how many other women he pulled that on and how it worked out for him.

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