This Franchise Doesn’t Own Them… Yet

I work in a members-only lounge at a popular theme park. We provide an air-conditioned space with charging stations, as well as free soda and coffee machines. There is also a [Coffee Shop] located just across the plaza in the park. This happens on the day [Coffee Shop] releases its Unicorn [Drink].

A customer approaches me at the check-in for the lounge.

Customer: “I’m here for my free Unicorn [Drink].”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “I heard you give free Unicorn [Drink]s to members. I want one.”

Me: “Do you mean the new [Coffee Shop] drink?”

Customer: “Yes. Someone in line had a coffee and said that they got it here for free. So I want a Unicorn [Drink].”

I realize what must have happened.

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, they must have meant our complimentary coffee. We do have a Keurig machine in the lounge that is for member use, but it’s just decaf or regular. We aren’t affiliated with [Coffee Shop].”

Customer: “What do you mean? [Theme Park] owns [Coffee Shop]!”

Me: “No, we don’t.”

Customer: “Yes, you do! I walked past one right outside!”

Me: “We have a partnership wherein we sell their coffee in their stores on property. But even if we did own them, the Unicorn [Drink] is a seven-dollar specialty drink. There is no way we could afford to give away thousands of those for free every day. You’re welcome to come up for a complimentary coffee, or if you really want the Unicorn [Drink], [Coffee Shop] is—”

The customer turns to go:

Customer: “I know where it is! The guest service here has taken a nosedive! [Founder of Theme Park] is turning over in his grave!”

Me: “Have a magical day!”