This Flavor Isn’t Grape

I work at a chain liquor store in my state as a wine specialist.

Customer: “Hi, I’m looking for a nice red wine that doesn’t have any added flavors to it.”

I am slightly confused but go along with it.

Me: “Added flavors, sir?”

Customer: “Yeah, I don’t want one of those wines that talk about added flavors of, like, coffee, or berry, or leather. Just regular red wine.”

Me: “Sir, there are very few wines that we have that have any kind of ‘added flavors-’ — just three in our store, in fact.”

Customer: “Then what makes it taste like things other than grapes if they don’t add them in?!”

Me: “Sir? Those flavors happen naturally, not by adding a flavoring in.”

Customer: “So, wine doesn’t taste like red or green grapes?”

It was SO hard to retain my retail smile. Luckily, I got paged by someone else who needed help, and I was able to bite my tongue and leave.

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