This Family Is Lawless

(I’m stocking shelves at work, when a customer approaches me.)

Man: “Excuse me, is [Manager] working today?”

Me: “Yeah, he should be in his office. Should I go get him?”

Man: “If you could, please. By the way, I’m [Name]; I’m [Manager]’s brother-in-law. Could you tell him that his sister’s here, too?”

Me: “Okay, I’ll be right back.”

(I go into my manager’s office to inform him that his relatives are waiting for him.)

Me: “Hey, [Manager], your brother-in-law is here; he wants to see you.”

Manager: “What?! I don’t have a brother-in-law!”

Me: *shocked* “Um, do you at least have a sister?”

Manager: “Oh, wait, are you talking about [Name]?”

Me: “Yeah?”

Manager: “Ugh, he’s getting ahead of himself again. He’s just the father of my niece; he’s not actually my brother-in-law yet.”

(My manager exits his office and goes out to the shop floor.)

Manager: “Hey! [Name]! Hurry up and marry my sister already, you lazy son-of-a-b****!”

Manager’s Sister: *turns red at the sight of every customer within earshot staring at them*