This Deal Is A Steal, Part 2

(A woman enters with one of our store bags in her hand and a receipt in the other.)

Me: “Hello, is this a return?”

Customer: “Yes, it is.”

(I take a glance at the receipt.)

Me: “Ma’am, we don’t do returns after thirty days of the purchase. You bought this item over four years ago.”

Customer: “What’s your point?”

Me: “Well, I can’t return this, ma’am.”

Customer: “Okay, I guess that’s fine. I’ll be back. I need to buy a few things.”

(The customer gets back in line after fifteen minutes.)

Me: “Did you find everything you were looking for?”

Customer: “Sure did! Here’s a coupon I have for my purchase.”

(I glance down at the coupon.)

Me: “Ma’am, this coupon expired over three years ago.”

Customer: “Why does your store not honor this? It’s a coupon!”

Me: “Yes, but it’s an expired coupon.”

(The customer angrily storms off, taking her unpaid item with her out the door. I am forced to write down her license plate number and call the cops on her.)