This Date Is Virtually Dead

(My brother and his girlfriend are playing a video game. We’re on a particularly bad level, with swarms of enemies appearing at once. He accidentally shoots her when she strafes in front of him, killing her.)

Girlfriend: “What was that?”

Brother: “Uh, I think I killed you. Well, they were going to kill you anyway. I just didn’t want them to do it. Nobody kills my girlfriend but me!”