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This Complaint Won’t Ever Get To Kick-Off

, , , , , | Right | April 15, 2022

I’m a shift supervisor at a store for a regional coffee chain. It’s a Sunday morning and we are absolutely slammed. The local favorite professional football team has a playoff game today. Most of our customers have been dressed in full purple and gold, trying to get their coffee before noon kick-off.

It is 11:50 am and a family of ten, in full purple and gold, walks in and comes to the counter to order. They each order a specialty drink and a sandwich. Because there are so many and we can only cook two at a time, the sandwiches alone will take us close to fifteen minutes to make. The last guy to order also pays.

Customer: “And hurry up! We need to be back home for kick-off!”

My cashier looks over at me.

Me: “Sir, [Team] kick-off is at noon; that’s in ten minutes. Your sandwiches alone are going to take about fifteen minutes to make. There’s no way you’ll be home in time.”

Customer: “We’ll make it in time if you quit talking and make our stuff!”

Trying not to roll my eyes, I join my coworker in making the order. The entire time, the man and his family are making loud comments about how slow we are and how they are going to miss part of the game. Even working as quickly as we can, it still takes us around fifteen minutes to finish everything. We hand off all the drinks and sandwiches only for the guy to say as they are all walking out the door:

Customer: “Thanks for nothing! We still have a fifteen-minute drive home! We’re going to miss the whole first quarter! I’m going to report you to your manager!” *Storms out*

I printed off a copy of his receipt, circled the time on it, and left it with an explanation on the back for my manager. Sure enough, the guy called in the next morning to complain. My manager burst out laughing on the phone and hung up on him.

How on earth did he think that coming in with ten minutes before the game starts, getting coffee, and then driving fifteen minutes home was going to work? Did they have a time machine?

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What is the absolute most stupid thing you’ve heard a customer say?

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