This Call Has Been A-Bridged

My husband and I are driving home from an event and taking the bridge that cuts an hour off our travel. The bridge is part of the highway that runs from one side of the state to the other.

When we get to the very top of the bridge, we must dodge around a chair that is in the middle of the lane that we are guessing fell out of someone’s truck. Thankfully, the person behind us also missed it. As it was at the very top of the bridge, where there are no emergency lanes, it would not be safe for us or anyone else without flashing lights to stop, as traffic would not notice them.

I decided to call the state highway patrol as it didn’t seem like an emergency serious enough to call 911, and I was on the highway, so it made sense to contact them.

A man very quickly picks up and gives a sigh.

Highway Patrol: “[State] Highway Patrol. How can I help you?”

Me: “Yes, I’m on [Name of the specific bridge], and there is a hazard at the top that could cause an accident.”

Highway Patrol: “We don’t service that bridge. What is the hazard?”

Me: “It’s a large office chair. Who should I call?”

Highway Patrol: “What side of the bridge is it on?”

Me: “The very top, at the hump.”

Highway Patrol: “What side? Closest to [City] or [City]?”

Me: “The very top, right in the middle of the bridge hump.”

Highway Patrol: “WHAT SIDE?!”

Me: “When you cross [Bridge Name] and you’re at the top, what side would that be?”

Highway Patrol: “DO YOU WANT ME TO HELP YOU OR NOT?”

Me: “I’m trying. You said you don’t cover the bridge. Who should I call?”

Highway Patrol: “IF YOU’RE NOT GOING TO ANSWER MY QUESTIONS, I CAN’T HELP YOU!”

Me: “It’s at the top of the bridge. That is my answer.”

Highway Patrol: “CALL 911 AND SEE IF THEY CAN HELP YOU AS YOU REFUSE TO ANSWER THE QUESTION!”

They then hang up the call.

I looked over at my husband and asked if I was missing something or if I was unclear. He looked as puzzled as I felt.

I called 911, and they confirmed the [State] highway patrol line was the department I was supposed to talk to. They said they would reconnect with me and stay on the line to ensure I was helped.

When they transferred me back to the (state) highway patrol line, a different man answered the phone and was very pleasant. He said that they covered the top, and they would send someone out now, as an office chair in the middle of the road could be very dangerous.

That was it.

Still have no idea how I could have answered the first guy differently.