This Booking Is Smoking Hot

(I work in a hotel. We don’t charge by the hour, but some “lovebirds” think we do. A pair comes in late at night.)

Young Woman: “Yes, we reserved a room through [Third-Party Reservation System].”

(My coworker looks through our computer system.)

Coworker: “Oh, [Young Woman]? Yeah, [Reservation System] cancelled it.”

Young Woman: “What?! No! You have to get it back!”

Coworker: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but this reservation was made through [Reservation System], and only they can—”

Young Woman: “We just called them a few minutes ago and asked if we could have a smoking room. We didn’t say to cancel!”

Coworker: “Why don’t you call them and tell them so?”

(She finally agrees, glaring at us like it’s our fault, and speaks with them.)

Young Woman: *on phone* “Hello! Yes! This is [Young Woman], and I didn’t tell you to f****** cancel my reservation!”

Customer Service Rep: “Yes, you did. You demanded a room, and you wanted a smoking one. When I said there was none, you said to forget it.”

Coworker: “Ma’am, can I?” *takes phone* “Yes, hello? This is the [Hotel]. Can you just send us a new reservation?”

Customer Service Rep: “No, because she wants to smoke.”

Young Woman: “God! I won’t smoke!”

(They go back and forth for a while, my coworker and the woman both yelling at the poor customer service rep. Finally, they hang up.)

Coworker: “They hung up!”

Young Woman: “I’m going to call them again. I can’t be looking for a new hotel at this time!”

(She does, and yells at the customer service rep, calling her all kinds of names and demanding a free room in compensation for her troubles. Finally, they send us a new reservation, and the girl gets her room and flounces away.)

Young Man: “You upset my girl! I won’t get laid tonight!”

(When they’re finally away, I turn to my coworker.)

Me: “They seemed really young. Did you check their IDs?”

Coworker: “No, in all the hullabaloo, I forgot…”

Me: “…”

Coworker: “But they paid [Reservation System], not us, so it should be okay…”

(A few hours later, they left. We all know what they did in those few hours! Ah, teens. Oh, yes, and they smoked up the room.)