Third Time Is A Charmer

(Before Valentine’s Day, 2007…)

Me: *to my boyfriend* “Don’t get me anything for Valentine’s Day. It’s a waste of money and we can get chocolate for half off the next day.”

Boyfriend: “Okay.”

(Despite what I tell him, I still get flowers delivered to me on Valentine’s Day. I call and berate him.)

Boyfriend: “Well, sometimes girls say they don’t but really do!”

(Before Valentine’s Day, 2008…)

Me: *talking to my next boyfriend* “Don’t get me anything for Valentine’s Day. It’s a waste of money and we can get chocolate for half off the next day. I yelled at last year’s boyfriend for doing it.”

Boyfriend #2: “Okay.”

(I still get flowers delivered to me on Valentine’s Day. I call and berate him.)

Boyfriend #2: “Well, sometimes girls say they don’t but really do!”

(Before Valentine’s Day, 2009…)

Me: *to yet ANOTHER boyfriend* “Don’t get me anything for Valentine’s Day. It’s a waste of money and we can get chocolate for half off the next day. I yelled at the last two boyfriends for doing it. And it’s your birthday, so seriously. Just don’t.”

Boyfriend #3: “Okay.”

(He doesn’t get flowers for me on Valentine’s Day. I call and thank him.)

Me: “THANK YOU!”

Boyfriend #3: “Well, if you tell me not to do something, I won’t.”

(I’m marrying him this year!)