Things Are Heating Up In The Pineapple-On-Pizza Debate

I’m taking orders at a pizza place. [Customer #1] has just ordered a large pineapple pizza, and I’m about to give her the total when [Customer #2] storms up and starts yelling at her.

Customer #2: “What the h*** is wrong with you?! No self-respecting American eats that s***! Get the f*** out of here! That is the most—”

[Customer #1] is beginning to tear up, and I’m about to kick this guy from the store when someone else interrupts [Customer #2]. [Customer #3] grabs him by the shoulder and spins him around, catching him off-guard.

Customer #2: “What the f***?! You have no business touch—”

Customer #3: “No.”

Customer #2: “Excuse me?”

Customer #3: “No. You’re an a**hole and a terrible excuse for a human being, and I’m not gonna sit here and watch it.”

Customer #2: “What the h*** are you going on about?! She’s the one who—”

Customer #3: “Why the f*** do you care how someone else likes their pizza?”

Customer #2: “I… Because…”

Me: “That’ll be all.” *To [Customer #2]* “You are not welcome here. Get out.”

We had to have [Customer #2] forcibly removed. [Customer #3] got a huge discount from me and a shower of tearful thanks from [Customer #1].