They Supersized Their Expectations

Guest: “Where’s the nearest McDonald’s?”

Me: “It’s in the city centre. If you take bus number—”

Guest: “No, I want one walking distance.”

Me: “There isn’t, madam.”

Guest: “So what do I do if I want to go out and eat dinner?”

Me: “Our hotel has a restaurant.”

Guest: “I don’t want to eat here.”

Me: “There’s a local restaurant open at the other end of the business park.”

Guest: “I want a chain restaurant.”

Me: “There are none of those within walking distance.”

Guest: “None at all?! And your hotel is comfortable with that?!”

Me: “Madam, you’re paying €39 a night to stay at a budget chain hotel in a business park next to the airport. You’re lucky anything is in walking distance. Now, the town centre is a twenty-minute bus ride away, or you can order online for delivery.”

Guest: “…Can you call me a taxi?”

Me: “Certainly.”

Guest: “Will the hotel pay for it since you built a hotel in a place with no restaurants?”

Me: “…No.”

Guest: “Ugh! It’s like you want me to starve!”