These Jobseekers Have A Lot Of Ketchup To Do

(A young man comes in looking to apply for a job. He asks for an application, which is given to him.)

Man: “Can I get a pen, too?”

(My manager does not like to accept applications from people who can’t be bothered to be prepared for a simple application. We are also located next to a dollar store that sells pens for under a dollar.)

Manager: “Yes. Just wait one moment. We are extremely busy right now.”

(We carry out business and have very little intention to get the man a pen from the back.)

Man: *after standing next to the register for another 15 minutes* “Oh, my god!”

(He went over to the condiment section, squeezed a massive amount of ketchup into the spill tray, grabbed a fork, and then proceeded to fill in the application with ketchup. Needless to say, we did not hire him.)