These Guys Have A Lot(tery) Of Nerve

, , , , , | Friendly | November 21, 2020

I recently won a good sum of money on the national lottery. It is just enough to settle my mortgage and car loan and some left over to help out a friend of mine and make a good donation to my favourite charity.

I accidentally let it slip that I won a “small amount” of money at work. The next day in the break room, two guys I don’t really know from another department approach.

Guy #1: “Hey, ain’t you the guy that won the lottery?”

Guy #2: “What are you still doing here?”

Me: “It was only a small amount, really.”

Guy #1: “Yeah, that’s what I would say, as well.”

Guy #2: “How are we celebrating? You got to bring something in.”

Me: “Well, actually, I—”

“I already did bring in a large selection of cakes,” is what I’d say if they would let me finish.

Guy #1: “Bring something in? No, we should go out. You can take us all out.”

Guy #2: “There’s that steak house.”

Guy #1: “Yeah! Our friend here can take us all out for steaks! Great idea.”

Me: “What’s my name?”

Guy #1: “What?”

He smirks at the other guy.

Me: “If we are such great friends, and you are not just a couple of guys who wanted to leech off of me… what’s my name?”

I left both of them dumbstruck trying to answer me. I am more than happy to share good times, but not with a couple of leeches that never acknowledged my existence before.

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