Their Technique Is Wibbly Wobbly Timey Wimey

(I am a huge fan of “Doctor Who,” and hate wasting my time with telemarketers. The phone rings.)

Me: “Hello?”

Telemarketer: “Hello, ma’am! Congratulations! You were selected by our fortune teller to get a prediction on your future for free!

Me: “Really? That’s wonderful! What’s his name?”

Telemarketer: “He’s called [Name].”

Me: “Aw, too bad! I wish it was The Doctor. I would have said yes…”

Telemarketer: *clueless* “What? No, no, ma’am, he’s not a doctor; he’s a fortune teller!”

Me: “Does he travel through time and space?”

Telemarketer: “Well, of course not!”

Me: “In that case, how would he be able to predict my future? I want the Doctor.”

Telemarketer: “But, ma’am, he’s not a doctor; he’s…”

Me: “Does he own a TARDIS?”

Telemarketer: “A what?”

Me: “How dare you offer me a free consultation with a so-called ‘fortune teller’ who doesn’t even own a TARDIS!”

Telemarketer: *sheepishly* “But, ma’am, it’s free…”

Me: “You Daleks! To h*** with you!” *click*