Their Gay Appalling

(I’m a waitress and my aunt and uncle come in with their great grandson, eight, and great granddaughter, six. Their grandson is my cousin [not the father of above children] and he’s around the same age as me. He’s also gay. His family jumps from being okay with it to being appalled by it. We make small talk and they order. I’m bringing out their food at this time.)

Me: “So how is [Gay Cousin]? I haven’t seen him and his boyfriend in awhile.”

Aunt: *stark white* “Fine.” *she says it fast and quick*

(I realize they’re in the appalled-by-it phase so I change the subject and leave the table. My aunt comes up to me as they’re cashing out.)

Aunt: “Look here. [Gay Cousin] is not gay. We don’t talk about it. He has his friend. I want you to go explain to [Young Niece and Nephew] that boys can’t be with boys. NOW!”

Me: *chuckles because I’m nervous and a little off-put* “They can, though. I’m just gonna tell them that sometimes, boys like boys and girls like girls. So maybe you’d prefer to tell them?”

(She looked like she wanted to kill me. At a loss for words, she turned away from me and walked out, telling her niece and nephew that I was going to Hell. She never talked to me again. Oh, well.)