The Wrong Kind Of Bird Bath
It’s five minutes to closing on the night before Thanksgiving when a frazzled man rushes in.
Customer: “Where are your turkeys?!”
Me: “I’m sorry, sir, we’re completely out. It’s the night before Thanksgiving.”
Customer: *Panicking.* “You can’t be! There’s got to be something left!”
I hesitate.
Me: “Well… we do have one frozen thirty-pound turkey in the back. But the reason it’s still here is because it won’t defrost in time.”
Customer: “I’ll take it!”
He practically sprints to checkout, clutching the giant bird.
Black Friday rolls around, and the store is already in chaos when the same man storms up to customer service.
Customer: “This turkey was terrible! I want a refund!”
My manager is working the customer service desk, so when he gets over the fact that someone is trying to get a refund on Black Friday, he asks:
Manager: “What seems to be the issue?”
Customer: “I left it in the hot tub all night before Thanksgiving to defrost, and it tasted bad!”
Manager: “Sir… if the worst thing that happened to you on Thanksgiving is that the turkey tasted bad, and not that your entire family ended up in the ER with food poisoning, then I’d say you had a pretty good day.”
He didn’t get his refund.
