The World’s Least Fun Game Of Tag

, , , , | Right | August 9, 2019

Customer: “So, I have these two swim cover-ups, and you guys forgot to take the security tags off.”

Me: “I’m sorry about that! I can get those off for you, but if I could see a receipt, that usually makes security happy.”

Customer: “No, but I swear to God I bought them here.”

(I take the swimsuit cover-ups out. They have no tags, but the security devices are similar to ours. However, the brands are not two I recognize.)

Me: “Are you sure you got them here? These don’t look familiar to me.”

Customer: “Yes, some girlfriends and I were shopping for our cruise a few months ago, so I bought them right here on clearance. They were only, like, fifteen dollars.”

Me: “We didn’t have swimsuits or cover-ups a few months ago, especially not on clearance. We just moved swim back up here from downstairs last week. We’re at [Retail Chain]; are you sure you didn’t mean to park outside [Other Two Anchor Chains]?”

Customer: “No, I bought it here. Right up here, in that corner over there. I bought them right here. I swear to God, I did, I bought them right here. They weren’t that much money.”

Me: “Okay, but my computer isn’t even showing that we carry these brands. So I’m just going to call a manager, okay?”

Customer: “Do whatever, but I need those tags off. I’m going on a cruise and I need them today. I don’t have time for this.”

(The manager comes and hears the whole story, and we have security Google who carries the brands. They are a [Different Retail Chain, not in our mall] exclusive brand.)

Manager: “So, you really will have to go over there and get these off. See?” *shows her on her phone that they aren’t our brand* “I’m afraid it isn’t our policy to remove other people’s security tags.”

Customer: “I didn’t buy them there! I’ve never gone there! I bought them here; I always buy things here. I swear to God they were on clearance. I bought them right here. I don’t know why you won’t believe me.”

Me: “Well, the problem with that is that I’m here 40 hours a week, every week. We did not have swim up here a few months ago; it was downstairs. We did not have any clearance, and those brands are [Different Retail Chain] exclusives, meaning we don’t carry them, we can’t carry them, and we never carried them. So, we can’t take off the security tags because they aren’t our merchandise. I don’t know else I can say this.”

Customer: “You are wrong. You are both wrong. I swear to God! I got them here!”

(My manager ends up taking them off and the customer leaves.)

Manager: “I didn’t really see how else we were going to solve that situation, so security said to just let it go.”

Me: “Well, if she did steal them, we know it wasn’t from us.”

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