The Treaty Of Versailles Was Very Unfair To Goths

, , , , , | Right | October 21, 2018

(I am the supervisor of an employment resource office, in a small non-profit agency which helps largely indigent and homeless people. This particular client is not the worst I’ve had, but he’s definitely one of the weirdest. He comes in occasionally to utilize the computers and fax machine, have us mail things for him, and apply for jobs, and he almost always says something bizarre.)

Me: “Hi, [Client]. How are you doing today?”

Client: *signing in* “Are you German?”

Me: “Uh, yes, why?”

Client: “I just think it’s funny. [My Name] is a very German name.”

(I get this comment a lot.)

Me: “Oh, it’s actually traditionally an English name! And mine is short for Fitzwilliam, which is Mr. Darcy’s first name in Pride and Prejudice. I am German, though.”

Client: “It’s a very German name.”

Me: “It’s not, though; it’s English. I mean, I guess I can see how—”

Client: *irritated* “No, it’s a German name!

Me: *giving up* “If you say so.”

(After a few minutes of silence.)

Client: *seriously* “Your people were treated very poorly by the Treaty of Versailles.”

Me: “Uh… I wasn’t there, but I guess that’s true.”

(He resumes his job search in silence for the next twenty minutes or so. As he is getting ready to leave, I look up to find him staring at me intensely.)

Client: “Have you been through your gothic stage yet?”

Me: “My what?”

Client: “Your goth stage.”

Me: *caught completely off guard* “I guess… I was kind of a goth in high school, maybe? Why?”

Client: *laughing* “Of course you were. I knew it; I can just tell that about you. Well, have a good day.” *leaves*

(Thanks for the uncomfortable half-hour! I’m already dreading the next time he comes in.)

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