The Thrilling Adventures Of Lady Literal

I work at a very standard national contact center. Most of the work we perform is also standard practice customer support.

One day, the phone rings, and on the other end is a company employee across the country. She’s nice enough, but I can hear in her voice that she is losing her patience.

Customer: “This is the third or fourth time I’ve had to contact you about this issue. For some reason, I just can’t log into my back office computer!”

That’s a simple enough fix. I pull up her password on my end and ask her to verify what username and password she is using. She butchers it, but she’s close enough. I can tell she’s likely just entering the right password incorrectly.

Me: “All right, ma’am, I’m going to read off your password to you, okay?”

I proceed to quickly ramble off the password followed by the obligatory comment:

Me: “And remember, this password is case-sensitive, so those letters must be capitalized.”

Customer: “Ohhhh, okay!”

She sounds like she gets it. I hear her typing in the password, but then:

Customer: *Very annoyed* “It still didn’t work!”

I ask her to try one more time for me, and by this time, I’m dialed in remotely. I begin to notice that the line of little black dots appearing where the password should be is clearly longer than the password we just discussed.

Me: “Hold on, hold on, ma’am.”

I explain the situation.

Customer: “Well I’m typing exactly what you told me!”

As a last-ditch effort, I pull up the actual password on her display. I quickly move the cursor back and forth over the password, highlighting it.

Me: “Okay, ma’am, this is your password. Can you see it?”

Customer: “Ohhhhhhh, yes!”

Right before she starts typing, I reassure her:

Me: “And remember, it’s case-sensitive, so the capital letters have to be capitalized.”

She begins to type, and I immediately notice that it’s way too long again. At this point, I’m frustrated.

Me: “Ma’am. I just showed you your password on the screen, and you’re clearly typing something else. Can I ask what you’re typing?”

Customer: *Angrily* “Well, you told me my password was ‘case-sensitive’!”