The State Eats Cuddly Puppies & Kittens, Too

Me: “Good Afternoon, [Mississippi Government Department]. How may I help you?”

Caller: “Yes, I would like y’all to get me some food stamps. My kids are hungry and I got fired last week.”

Me: “Ma’am, we don’t issue food stamps. You need to contact the Department of Human Services.”

Caller: “What?! My cousin told me to call y’all and y’all would get us fed. I know the State has lots of monies, can’t you just send us some?”

Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, you need to call DHS and they will be able to assist you.”

Caller: “F*** You! The God-D***ed State never does a d*** thing for us poor folks! I hope you feel the fires of Hell for starving children!” *click*

Me: *stunned silence*