The Royal Kiss-Off

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(There was a really long line at the convenience store I work at. A female customer at the back of the line was calling out to me.)

Customer: “Excuse me, sir, I’d like to purchase this item.”

Me: “Um…there’s a line of about 10 people in front of you. You have to wait for them.”

Customer: “But I don’t want to!”

Me: “…”

Customer: “This is an outrage! I’m a queen!”

Me: “…of where?”

Customer: “Oompaloompaland!”

Me: “Um…sorry to break it to you, but Oompaloompaland only exists in books.”

Customer: “That’s it!” *storms out*

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