The Only Size You Are Is Perfect

I come from a country that has weird expectations of women’s bodies. I have always been a chubby girl. I was taunted my entire childhood for that, and after pregnancy, I have gained some more weight. I have always been on various diets and exercises, and my weight fluctuates like the weather.

I have moved temporarily to London and am clothes shopping one day. It’s a beautiful high-end shop known for good collections of formal clothes. Every design that I like is not available in my size, and naturally, I am upset about it. A shop assistant comes up to help me.

Clothes shopping has never been fun for me at all, so I am apprehensive to ask for help. I am also worried that I may offend her by declining help.

Me: *Timidly* “Umm… I am not finding anything that fits me well.”

Employee: “What size are you looking at?”

Me: “I am not very familiar with the sizes here. Eight or ten seems too small and sixteen and above is a little too big. I am guessing twelve to fourteen may be my size but I am not sure. There aren’t many options in that size range.”

Employee: “Well, ma’am, that’s a popular size range in work attires. This is the middle of summer and peak shopping season; we usually run out of those sizes pretty soon, but I can check our system and let you know if we have any in stock in our store or any nearby stores. If you are sure, we can place them on hold, too. Do you want to do that?”

I was surprised that A) she did not judge me, B) she is happy to help, and C) if my size is popular, then there are many women like me, so I am not abnormally huge! With these thoughts in my head, I show her a few designs that I like and she gets a few of them for me to try on. When I am done making my choices and am leaving with my purchase, I summon the courage to thank her.

Me: “Thanks so much for your help! You have no idea how incredibly helpful you have been.”

Employee: “No problem at all, ma’am! I am glad you found something you liked.”

Me: “Well, that’s the point. I usually never find anything in my size. I have had people mock at me for not being slim. Clothes shopping for people like me is a nightmare. You’ve made it so much easier today.”

Employee: “I don’t know why anyone would make you think like that! Most women I have met are in this size range, but we really shouldn’t limit ourselves by our bodies.”

I got really emotional because of her words. We talked a bit about body shaming and such. I had never felt so empowered about my body.

I am slowly on the path to accepting myself for who I am rather than by what society wants me to be. I maintain a healthy lifestyle and am still no skinny person, but I have stopped worrying about my weight when I occasionally decide to indulge. It’s a long journey of self-acceptance, but thanks to that kind lady who gave me the much-needed confidence. I can never forget her!