The Mother Of All Dangerous Drivers

(I’m waiting in my car at a traffic light when my car eases forward a bit. I apply more pressure to the brakes, but the car makes a groaning noise and eases forward a bit more.)

Me: “What’s going on? I hope the brakes aren’t giving out.” *glancing at the rearview mirror* “Oh God!”

(The woman behind me has an insane smile and is cackling like a witch. I realize she is purposely grinding her car’s bumper against mine.)

Me: “Who is that crazy woman? Why is she doing this?!”

(I suddenly recognize her and feel relieved.)

Me: “Oh! It’s just Mom.” *pause* “What the h*** is she doing?!”

(The light soon turned green so that I could escape. I was so shocked that I never confronted her about what she did.)