The Milk Has Expired, And So Has Our Patience
I was working at a convenience store one late July 4th morning. The cosmic coincidence on display that day ensured I would remember it forever.
I’m manning the register while my manager, let’s call him Rick, is “supervising” from the candy aisle, which mostly involves him eating unpaid-for beef jerky and pretending to rearrange gum. He always tries to schedule himself off on every holiday, but the district manager noticed and forced him to work today, so he’s acting extra lazy and petulant in protest.
A customer comes in holding a gallon of milk.
Customer: “Hi, I bought this literally twenty minutes ago, and it smells like a foot left in the sun. Can I return it?”
Rick doesn’t even look up from his phone.
Rick: “We don’t do returns on perishables. Company policy.”
Customer: “It’s expired. It says so. Look, June 28th.”
Rick: “Still not our fault. Should’ve checked the date before buying.”
Customer: “I assumed you didn’t sell expired dairy.”
Rick: “And I assumed people read labels, but here we are.”
I start sinking into the floor.
Customer: “Fine. Can I at least toss this one and grab a new one?”
Rick: “Not unless you pay for the new one.”
She holds up the milk again.
Customer: “You want me to pay twice because you didn’t pull bad stock?”
Rick: “You want compensation? Email corporate. I’m not authorized to care.”
That’s when our district manager, who was doing a surprise July 4th visit, steps in from behind the energy drink fridge. He later said he suspected all the bad reviews we got online were due to Rick and had been planning to investigate.
District Manager: “Actually, Rick? You are authorized to care. That’s literally your job.”
Rick freezes like a raccoon in a flashlight beam. The district Manager nods at the woman.
District Manager: “Ma’am, grab yourself a fresh gallon. And if you see anything else expired, let us know. We’ll make sure Rick rings it up personally.”
He then turns to me.
District Manager: “And if he gives you trouble, just remind him that expired milk isn’t the only thing that can be removed from the store.”
Rick was fuming, but actually worked on his tasks the rest of that day in blessed silence.
A few months later, when Rick was fired, the District Manager told me he really came in that day to avoid his in-laws on July 4th, pretending there was a ‘store emergency’ that needed his attention. He was both happy and sad that the universe had actually given one to him.
